Mario, may I congratulate you on a variety of things in this paper. Firstly, that you trusted your intuition enough to take a chance, strengthened by the support of your critical friends, to extend to your pupils this chance to be so creative. Second, that you are so honest about both your values, and the way you have criticised yourself when you felt that was helpful. Third, that you have had the courage to offer this paper for public scrutiny. Fourth, that you have been so specific in your methods here, so another teacher could see how you have done your action research, and perhaps seek to replicate the work in their own context.
A couple of suggestions, besides the ones in the paper: perhaps delete one or two of the videos â€“ I found myself taking a LONG time to view these, and it made the paper quite long. Donâ€™t remove more than one or two of the links though. It is the inclusion of the video links that helps the reader to see the congruity between your claims, and your practice, which of course is fundamental in living educational theory, and the purpose of this journal. Also, have you thought of taking this work to a local, national or international conference? I do believe that your innovative practice deserves a wider audience than may be reached just by EJOLTS. All the best with any subsequent work that you wish to do on this paper, and for your future educational growth. Croatia is lucky to have you â€“ especially in the early stages, where in my country (New Zealand) we really struggle to attract male teachers in the early years of schooling.
Pip, firstly I want to express my gratitude for your review of my paper. It's really nice to know that you give importance to my paper and that you consider it valuable enough to be published in an international journal such as the EJOLTS is.
As regards the wider and further presentation of my practise I can say that this AR Report will be published in the conference proceedings of the international conference that will be held in PoĹľega from September 28-30 2009.
I think that there is not important difference regarding the situation with male teachers in primary level of educational system in Croatia with those in New Zealand. Namely, the male teachers in the early stage of schooling are minority in the Croatian educational system.
My best regards, Mario
I wish to express at the onset how much I enjoyed reviewing this paper. I spent several enjoyable hours immersed in your world of creation and fun in the class room and standing by the side of an innovative and compassionate teacher.
The paper needs some work on before it is ready for publication. It needs to be published as it tells a great story from many perspectives. I hope that my comments will help you strengthen your account and if I can help you further in any way do not hesitate to contact me. I attach your original document with comments.
Here are my major observations.
1. Please check out the journal submission format and re arrange your paper to meet the criterion on the journal. Â Foot notes and the referencing format need to be corrected.
2. Some small English and typing errors need to be corrected.
3. Identify in the text your thinking and use a font that shows it is reflection.
4. Indent quotations and texts over 40 words long, in italics.
5. Engage with the comments of your critical readers/friends.
6. Be positive you are doing great work, own your story.
7. I am worried by your expectations of a projected outcome and would like to see that you allowed yourself to enjoy the flow of the creative learning in keeping with your critical friends comments.
8. I think there are too many strands to this paper. What you have achieved with the publication of the journal is marvellous. Â Perhaps you could focus on that a little deeper?
9. References to the literate are limited and could use much more exploration and inclusion of the wide body of literature that exist in child development and artistic creative development, living action research.
10. Videos need some explanations in the text from you as to what we are seeing.
Please have confidence on a job well done, and I hope to engage with you and help you further. My deepest respects.
Je Kan, I'm very glad that you enjoyed reading and reviewing my paper. I'm honoured with the cognition that you have been immersed in my world of creation and fun, as you call it. You are probably right saying that the paper needs some work before ready for publication, but at the same time I consider that there is still lot of work to improve my educational practise on the way heading due the higher aim: creation and fun, as you say.
Thanks for your objective comments which will be helpful in my further educational efforts.
My best regards, Mario
This is a lovely and very interesting piece of work! I encourage you to continue with the process of opening up to other colleagues and friends about your professional work! I know it can be very challenging but I have see both in myself and in my colleagues, that it can be very rewarding because it helps you to grow more and develop your own potential further; it also helps your colleagues to do the same, and you can learn a lot from what each other is doing! So it is a further stimulus to everyoneâ€™s creativity!
You have mentioned some of the material changes that took place in the children, the classroom, the school, etc. It seems that you have also developed the value of fostering collaboration in learning. I am wondering if you may find that the values you hold and expressed at the start of the article (democracy, freedom and creatvity, respect for the childrensâ€™ personality, etc.), may have also developed somewhat in the children themselves and in other people in your school through your efforts to live them personally?!
just a few small suggestions!
Perhaps change the word â€śreportâ€ť for â€śarticleâ€ť when you refer to this piece of writing.
You could unify the way of referring to your action research diary. Sometimes you write Action research diary, other times you write Action Research diary/Action Research Diary/research diary, etc. I would tend to refer to it as action research diary when you mention it in the text, although the main thing is to always use the same form of reference .
I cannot find the details of the reference to Pressley et al whose work you mention towards the end of the paper, in the reference section of the paper! I would be interested in reading it if it exists in English!
thank you for your comments on my paper. I find it very encouraging. I hope that I will succede to make necessary amendments according the given comments and resubmit my paper till the deadline.
Regarding the reference to Pressley I can say that I do not refere directly to Presley. I refer to the book â€žPsychology in Educationâ€ś, page 685 where Pressley was mentioned. Actually the authors of the book ( A.Wolfolk, M. Hughes and V. Walkup) refer to Presley and his colleagues on that page.
I have finally succeeded to resubmit my paper and you can read it at the following address: http://ejolts.net/files/journal/2/2/Mario_Gavran2.doc.
Firstly, I wish to thank you all (Pip, Je Kan and Catherine) for careful review of my paper. I have found your comments very objective and useful for me to make necessary amendments according your remarks. I hope that these changes will suffice for my paper to be published in the new issue of the EJOLTS.
As regards the videos included in the paper, I'm currently adding the English subtitles into them. Next week you will be able to watch these videos which I am going to upload to YouTube since it allows captions.
Best regards, Mario
Well done with this new version of your paper! It has gained a lot with the work you have put into it in terms of clarity, references to action research living theory, videos, etc.
I am attaching the article with some further small suggestions to improve the English and facilitate our comprehension of your work.
I have also included some suggestions which you could think about regarding research into what other people have published on some of the issues which you deal with in your paper. If you can find the time and resources to look a little further into other literature it may help you to discover the originality of your work and to consolidate your contribution to the world of professional practice from an academic perspective!
I wish you the best of luck as you proceed to finalise your paper!
In my opinion, it could be published as it is, however, it would have greater academic weight and value if you are in a position to do some further research into other people's published work, and to incorporate these references into your article so as to enrich it further!
I hope that we can meet when I travel to Pozega for the conference in September!
I'm glad that you think I succeeded to improve the latest version of my paper although, according your suggestions, there are some more improvements to do in the article. I tried to take into consideration your latest suggestions so I attempted to place my article into the context of other similar works with the same issue I deal with in my paper. I hope that I succeeded to enrich further the article with some more references. The recent changes in the text have been written in green letters. Although I'm aware that my paper won't be published in this issue of the EJOLTS , I hope that now it has enough quality in order to be published in the forthcoming (autumn/winter) issue .
I also hope, and it would be my pleasure, that we will meet at a conference in PoĹľega.
It was nice to meet you when I was in Pozega! I am sorry that we did not have more time to talk.
I have read through the newest version of your article and I can see that you have engaged with literature on various issues and have incorporated some of your thoughts on what you have read into your work. This is great and I hope that you also feel encouraged to continue reading around on the issues in education, creativity, etc., which are of interest to you.
You may find it useful, in future, to read more on the living theory aspect of action research, which is becoming a form of academic/practitioner research in its own right; it may give you further insights into what you are doing in the classroom and help you in developing your own living theory of education!
In my opinion, your current article as it stands now (with the agreement of the editorial board) can be published in the next edition of EJOLTS.
Good luck as you begin the new school year in Pozega! It must be getting cold there now!
It was my great pleasure and privilege to meet you in PoĹľega . It was really nice to talk to you, although we did not talk much. What a pity that we didn't have more time to talk since Branko invited me to join you that first evening you were in Pozega but it turned out that I traveled back home from Zadar, so I wasn't able to be with you that evening. Also , I was not able to go to Kutjevo where we could have more time to talk
I'm glad that you have read through my article again and that you think it is ready to be published now. It is really important for me to publish my paper because it reflects not only all my educational efforts I've done last year , but represents my educational values I consider important in my whole professional life. Of course that I will continue with my further professional development reading more on the living theory aspect of action researches creating thus my own living theory.
Thanks for the good wishes at the beginning of the new school year.
You are right about the weather in PoĹľega. . Those nice sunny days when the Conference took place are gone now and the weather really changed. The period of more frequent rains begins and the first signs of forthcoming autumn are more obvious. That autumn signs and all warm colours of October reminds me of the Dylan Thomas' Poem in October where he in one of the verses says: â€śâ€¦ the town bellow lay leaved with October bloodâ€¦â€ś
Indeed, all the colours of autumnn are visible now at the foothills of PoĹľeĹˇka gora which surround PoĹľega.
Once again I express my gratitude for your engagement in reviewing my article .
My best regards,
With other commitments, I haven't been back and revisited your work forÂ some time. It is great to see your openness in taking the suggestions of reviewers on board, and I will look forward to the publication of the paper in due course.
I did envy Catherine her ability to attend your conference in PoĹľega recently! It must be great to be relatively close, in Europe, to enable this kind of attendance and enrichment to occur. We are a loooonnng way away here in New Zealand! But it is good to be able to share practice, and the use of videos to demonstrate that practice, as EJOLTS encourages, is a good way to help others, however, remotely situated, to see the work enacted.
I do hope that your conference was a positive event for you and that you received some good comments on your work.
Pip Bruce Ferguson
I'm glad that you've been through my paper again despite probably numerous daily commitments you have. I know that it takes a lot of energy to read and review papers like mine. Therefore I thank you on that, hoping that my paper will be published in the next issue of EJOLTS.
As for the Conference in PoĹľega I can say that I'm very happy it was held here, in my town because such events like this conference are really rare in small town like PoĹľega. It was really great to be part of such educational event since it broadend my educational horizons. I had an opportunity to gain insight into what other people are doing and to compare my own practise with others which was really great.I think It was really positive event for all of us who participated in it.