Paper for special June EJOLT issue consideration - published June 2015
hi Jocelyn - great to see you here and your reviewers will post their reviews as soon as they can. Hope you enjoy our review process as well as finding it educational. You might like to have a look at the conversations in some of the other reviews to get a feel for it. Looking forward to this review conversation evolving. A note to your reviewers - respond to Jocelyn's posting 4th April not the earlier one - Marie
Aloha and thank you,
Thanks so much for your openness to feedback. In this latest iteration, I can clearly see how hard you have worked. You have o (a) been more overt about Steiner education, to help your readers; (b) made clear your own cultural background and how you have sought to work safely with Hawai'ian educators in the workshop; and (c) strengthened your literature review by referring to additional relevant work.
In the literature references, my 2008 paper should be Bruce Ferguson, P. not Ferguson, and Linda Tuhiwai Smith, to be consistent with other usages, should be Smith, L.T. (not Linda Tuhiwai).
You had a lovely strong statement at the end of the first iteration about your values, particularly with regard to spirituality, which appears to have been left out of this iteration. Personally, I'd love to see it back in again, but over to your other reviewers.
With these minor points covered, I'd recommend publication. All the best with your ongoing work Jocelyn. It DOES sound exciting and important.
Aloha e Pip,
Thank you so much for your support and encouragement! I have made the corrections you pointed out--thank you. I am also wondering if the values statement you are referring to is this one below:
"My continued research also provides me the opportunity to
further articulate my spiritual values:that human beings are spiritual beings impacted by larger beings present
in the land and in the cosmos, and that recognizing these beings may cause us
to flourish, achieve our personal missions, and evolve in our consciousness. "
I ask because I don't think I intentionally took the values statements out and this one is still in (and I do think it is lovely!), as is the one from my dissertation.
Mahalo nui loa,
Arohamai (sorry!) Jocelyn. You did indeed leave the spiritual values statement in - not sure how I missed it. I actually feel there are other values evident in your paper, one of which is a conscious sensitivity to and respect for the cultural values of those in your 'adopted' country of Hawai'i, even though you've lived there for most of your life. This comes through clearly as I read your paper, but I'm not sure you've claimed it as a value per se. Over to you though, they are YOUR values and I should have pointed that one out earlier.
All the best - hope your other reviewers recommend publication but that's for them to decide.
Dear Jocelyn - I've enjoyed reading your paper very much and appreciate the way you have strengthened your paper through responding to your reviewers' comments. I have no hesitation in recommending it for publication.
I'm delighted to see you acknowledging the evidence in your Ed.D. and other writings, that supports your recognition of yourself as a Doctor Educator - I'm looking forward to seeing what I can do to spread the influence of your ideas and to seeing how they evolve, especially in relation to anthroposophy and the expression of your unique spiritual values in an explanation of your educational influence in your own learning and in the learning of others (and perhaps, through the academic legitimacy of your ideas, in the learning of the social formations that influence our practice). As your research continues I do hope that you will share what emerges:
"My continued research also provides me the opportunity to further articulate my spiritual values:that human beings are spiritual beings impacted by larger beings present in the land and in the cosmos, and that recognizing these beings may cause us to flourish, achieve our personal missions, and evolve in our consciousness."
I am looking forward to sustaining our conversation. It might be that you could produce a living-poster to share with other Living Theory researchers as we undertake joint action in learning with and from one another (the theme of the Action Research Network of the Americas Conference 8-9 May 2015 in Toronto) after the Conference. See the posters at:
There is a small typo in your references - edcucators should be educators:
Whitehead, J. & Huxtable, M. (2014). Creating a profession of edcucators with the living-theories of master and doctor educators. Paper presented at Breakfast Café Conversation.
I have also added the url for the retrieval of the paper in the correct reference below.
Whitehead, J. & Huxtable, M. (2014). Creating a profession of educators with the living-theories of master and doctor educators. Paper presented at Breakfast Café Conversation. Retrieved 4th May 2015 from http://www.actionresearch.net/writings/jack/JWMHgei151114.pdf
Jack, once again, mahalo for all the support in this process. I so appreciate your feedback. I have made the corrections you pointed out and attach the next iteration here. I will also check out the posters and see what that is all about. So much to learn! Thank you for pointing me in the right direction. I, too, look forward to continued conversation!
Thanks so much for posting this paper. It's good to see work from the Steiner/Waldorf/anthroposophy perspective being submitted to the journal - the first I can recall, and I've been reviewing for a good while now.
As is my usual practice, I have provided a copy of the document with track changed comments on it. I've found this the best way of interacting with authors, demonstrating my understanding (or lack of it!) about their work, providing ideas for change or strengthening and frequently to work I think may be of interest for future work.
To summarise, then: the paper is not yet ready for publication, in my opinion, but won't take a lot to bring it up. First, thanks so much for your excellent editing. I found only one place where I've suggested rewording, ad I'm very pedantic.
Secondly, I do think that you need to give a little more of your cultural/ethnic/values-based identity at the start. This is vital when you're writing about a context of work with indigenous peoples. You gave a very good statement at the end about your values but I think it would vastly help your readers to have a little more perspective at the start of the paper.
Thirdly, I think it would also help if you provided a little more information about Waldorf schools and the beliefs of Steiner that underpinned those. I suggested towards the start of the document that you do this by URL, but as I progressed it became plain that the work is so embedded in a Steinerian approach that I think you owe it to your readers to give a little more information.
Fourthly, the paper reads largely as your own work, as it is, after all, a reflection of work you'd done for your dissertation. Can you tell us any more about the folk you worked with, and how their perspectives influenced your practice? They seem a bit hidden in this account, but I'm sure you learned from them. This is alluded to, but I'd love to see it a bit more overt.
Finally, there is not a tight linkage to living educational theory work in the paper. Jack will probably say more about that, but it would be good to see your understanding of this, and why you've submitted your paper to THIS journal.
I very much look forward to the next iteration Jocelyn. So many parts of this paper resonate with me!
Pip, I really enjoyed reading your comments and agree that all the areas you indicated could use some expansion or further explanation. Thank you for all the time you put into this!
Pip, I neglected to say that I am also very grateful for a New Zealand/Maori connection here. Yes, very similar cultural understandings and it so good to be reminded that this is an international community we are operating in. I am particularly interested in exploring how the Maori culture is woven into NZ Waldorf schools (another paper!). Thank you.
Hi Jocelyn - I absolutely DO NOT want to distract you from the next iteration - but for future reference, you may be interested in checking out the articles from
They are quite mixed - the top one is very critical but most of the subsequent ones are positive. Have fun...will very much be looking forward to your next iteration. I'm on annual leave 13 - 21 April with limited access, so if there's any way you can get it loaded before then, I can give you feedback faster.
Dear Jocelyn, Thank you for submitting this paper to EJOLTS so that we could share in what is clearly a significant journey for you and one that will benefit those in your care in the future. I found the paper intriguing and thought stimulating. The construct of place as having a spirit that influences (and can be transformed over time) is very well contextualised in your paper. I would like to suggest that more description is added to those concepts where others (such as myself) might not be familiar with outside the Waldorf community so that your reader remains engaged in your narrative. I have signposted these in the text so will not repeat them here. Also you refer to your values in an extract in the last section and then follow up with a single spiritual value in the next paragraph. Are these the same? The text seems to suggest that there are more values. Finally, you have grounded your work firmly within a cultural context but you don't share much about yourself personally. Adding this aspect will enhance your narrative.
I would like to congratulate you on your doctorate and on this paper. From experience I know that the community of living theorists is a supportive one and I hope that we see the revised paper in "print" and look forward to more of your work!
Liz, I am so glad you asked me to make my values more explicitly a focal point of the paper and look forward to doing so. It was a thought that crossed my mind as I was writing so you have validated my intuition. Thank you for all the time you have spent on this and for the valuable feedback!
Liz, thank you so much for your help in developing my paper further. I have posted a revision under Marie's original notice to you.
Aloha and thank you,
Dear Jocelyn, I have read the revised paper and would like to congratulate you on your connection with yourself, your students, the place of your work and now the readers of your text. I felt engaged and included throughout! Well done and I hope to read more of your work soon. Best wishes, Liz
Dear Jocelyn - I'm very impressed with your ideas and the way you express these in your writings. I am hoping that you will engage with the points I'm raising in this note and look at the comments that I've included in your paper. Do just be careful that I'm not imposing my own enthusiasms and interests in an inappropriate way on your own.
I believe that you could enhance the importance of your paper with some significant but easily done amendments. For example, I'm suggesting that you recognise the importance of recognising yourself as a doctor educator. I think that you will understand why I am saying that this recognition is so important in contributing to enhancing professional if you read the paper by Marie Huxtable and myself, on master and doctor educators that has been accepted for publication in an issue of Gifted Education International in January 2016.
I also believe that you could reference a 2008 paper by Pip Bruce-Ferguson which started a discussion on researching indigenous knowledge in the British Educational Research Association Newsletter, Research Intelligence. I've put the references and urls to both papers in the comments in the attached paper.
I've also suggested where you could explicitly reference the importance of the generation of your own living-educational-theory because as well as showing your understanding of an action research approach, you have generated and shared your own living-educational-theory as an explanation of your educational influences in your own learning, in the learning of others and in the learning of the social formations that influence your practice and understandings. I've put into a comment the live url to the first page of the homepage of EJOLTS under commitments, that highlight and reference this point.
As your enquiries develop with a focus on spiritual values and representation I think that you will find useful several multi-media publications in EJOLTS, such as the December 2013 issue, that focus on clarifying the meanings of such values as they emerge through their embodied expression in practice and their use as explanatory principles in explanations of influence, and as living standards of judgment. I'll pause here because I don't what to overload you with responses, but I do hope that we can continue our conversation.
Jack, mahalo for your support and your specific suggestions of references. I look forward to exploring those citations and to thinking much more consciously of my thoughts as living-educational-theory. Am traveling but excited about digging into all of this and writing further over the weekend. Yes, may the conversation continue! Thank you!